Thursday, June 24, 2004

My New Image

A lot of heavy stuff going on in the world lately, but I feel like being frivolous. So here goes...

So I'm taking stock of my life lately and seeing what it all adds up to. Breastfeeding, check. Breastfeeding in public places and in front of every male in my family, check. Obsession with knitting in particular and handmaking things in general, check. No makeup and not even a bra unless I'm going somewhere, check. Apparently, I have some granola tendencies. Was I always like this? I guess so. It's just more pronounced now. So I'm trying to punk up my life a little. Show that I still know from style and am more than just your average stay at home mom. But what can I do? Pink dye would only cover up the grey hairs of which I am inexplicably proud. A tattoo is an awfully big step. And for that matter, a tattoo of what? If only they had polls on blogger... Well, I'm taking submissions. My favorite idea is just to get a tattoo of the word "tattoo." Wanna see my tattoo? You get the joke. *I* think it's a funny one. Anyway... yes, I understand what a unique snowflake slash space monkey I am. I just want to tweak my image a little. I just don't know where to start. It's weird. I'm happier than I've ever been. I love my husband. I have a beautiful, happy baby who is (thank you, Jesus) healthy. And she sleeps through the night, too. I just figure... I went through 22 hours of labor AND a c-section and have embraced the resulting adult lifestyle that the aftermath required. I just want a physical outward sign that says I acknowledge all that, and I'm not dead yet, either.

And smoking is out. it's been almost a year since my last cigarette. I can no longer take the guilt with the littering, the harm it causes my body, as another person now depends on it for transportation, hygeine and food. Not to mention the smell on my clothes. And my knitting. Yuck! Stinky knitting. Good thing I quit when I did. But I SO miss it. Like I miss sleeping in positions that deny Lily immediate access to my boobs. There are just things I can not do anymore. So I want to explore those routes that are still open to me. Speaking of that, if you can't donate blood after you get a tattoo, what's the rule on breastfeeding and tattoos? There's a question for the La Leche League. tattoos are probably out. I guess part of being an adult is just learning that it might just be enough for me to be me. As soon as I find out where they sell the pink hair dye near my house.

1 comment:

Mary J. said...

One way to "punk" your image would be to dress Lily in little hipster outfits. Ya know - tees that read: Born to Rock, or Bad to the Bone. Other than that, I think you're great the way you are. Of course I didn't know pre-mommy Jenny, but I like the crafty mama you've become.